GUILT: Guilty as charged…. A feeling of responsibility, or remorse, wrongness…real or imagined. Guilt is a word that I wrestle with… maybe, because I’ve been guilty of so much WRONG in my life… leaving me with a ‘guilty conscience.’ I feel bad enough when I’ve done something that I should not have done… but applying the word GUILT…. On top of it… well, it’s an “on-going” feeling that I don’t need, or want. A REMINDER!
I don’t like the word…CULPABILITY, either… but for some reason… seems less of an evil….or a SMALLER guilt. CULPABILITY “seems like” a “lesser charge” than GUILTY…as charged. As I was trying to say, earlier… GUILT sounds so serious, and so fatal. Whereas GULPABILITY ….much less so.
Just recently, I was sharing with a Minister friend of mine, that… while I have CONFESSED my sins to God; too often, I still feel GUILT from that sin(s). Now… let’s not get into the possibility that “maybe,” I wasn’t sincere enough… thus the reason for the lingering guilt.
My Minister friend, suddenly, pulls up his pant leg, clear up to his knee-cap, and shows me this horrible scar, about the size of a silver-dollar, with a number of 6” spider-like legs extending from it…. A really BAD-SCAR. He goes on to explain… that his scar is a REMINDER of a terrible motorcycle accident; whereby a “bull” had run out in front of him, causing him to “hit the bull,” and nearly lose his leg. He continues to explain… with vivid clarity… that the SCAR will never go away, and is “the REMINDER of his GUILT” (he was riding the motorcycle against his Mother’s instructions…not to) … comparing it to the feeling of “lingering GUILT” one might experience. He concludes with….. “I LOVE that SCAR.” Meaning… that GUILT is a REMINDER of one’s wrong-doing….NEVER to do it again. W-O-W… I thought, what a parable that would make.
We are told in… Job 11:16 – And that he would tell you the secrets of wisdom! For he is manifold in understanding. Know then that God exacts of you less than your guilt deserves.
I am reminded… in “The Lord’s Prayer,”….”forgive us of our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.” So then, it would seem, too, that we must FORGIVE ourselves; and in doing so…maybe that SCAR will began to fade.